So you thought the first post reintroducing The Life Atelier would be full of champagne bubbles, a release of free-range grass fed butterflies with mini Sofia Coppola-esque macaroons floating through the air?
Yeah me too.
But my dog is chasing a wasp and has been barking at it for the last hour as it miserably bumps into the wall of glass and I feel unreasonably furious that it can’t locate the open door, sure that if I was a wasp, I would never be so stupid.
Obviously.
And there is a beep that I cannot locate the source of, it has been beeping at random from outside and inside the house for the last 3 days.
And I’m tired.
Because I live in possibly the most extroverted village of all the extroverted villages in one of the most extroverted countries in Europe and the 80 year olds have been partying until 3 am for the last 3 nights.
RAAAAAAAh!!!!! That feels better.
So instead, I thought I would introduce you today to tactical grumpiness.
Tactical grumpiness is where instead of trying to pretend something doesn’t annoy you, you just lean into it.
Let it all out.
List every single thing you’re thinking. (I like to make Otter listen to me while I walk, I feel guilty complaining to the dog, she doesn’t deserve that)
All of it. Get as ridiculous as a two year old, complain about the colour of the sky if you want.
Feel it - where do you feel the injustice, the frustration, why are you so bothered by this?
I had one particularly enjoyable rant where I blamed feeling hot and uncomfortable in August on the Spanish Government’s feeble response to climate change. Damn them.
Then stop. (Usually at this point I start to laugh at my own demands.)
And ask yourself ‘What DO you like about your life?’
Once you’ve got rid of the pious need to not be grumpy, you’re back to neutral.
Back to honesty.
Honesty is a good place to be, especially with yourself.
Honesty with ourselves is often the most uncomfortable place to be too.
We wiggle and squirm away from the truth with a myriad of ‘it’s fine really’ and ‘I’m sure I’ll be happier when…..’
And the little thoughts burrow away in our brain, they start to do damage.
- Gabor Maté’s book ‘The Myth of Normal’ documents the impacts of people pleasing on our health and it is truly devastating.
Instead, by using tactical grumpiness/sadness/anger/frustration - insert the emotion you avoid the most, we can convert a life lesson from a weeks - years process into 3 minutes.
You’re welcome!
So. This wasn’t the post I meant to write, I had intended something inspirational and powerful but light, about self-trust and how you can build your own Life Atelier right here in this space, or working with me as your coach (or on an ayahuasca trip if that’s your cup of tea)
But then there was the beep. And the wasp. And my dog*.
And the guilt of not appreciating every single second of my dog being alive after she nearly died.
And I thought - well, I’m going to be around here a lot, let’s kick off by talking about tactical grumpiness!
So re-welcome, I feel like this week I took possession of this space properly (made the buttons raspberry pink) and have moved in.
I can see we’ll have threads and notes and podcasts and videos and all sorts of exciting things, but today I’ll just say hello and put a little reintroduction below!
*The dog is now snoozing calmly having happily completed her mission as far as she know to chase away the wasp, who has departed the building, hurrah!
Other Links:
I run a free community on Mighty Networks called The Conversation all about creating Life Balance and will be hosting a free workshop there (while I work out the lives over here!) this 🥐 Sunday about self-trust and time freedom, you are of course invited! Click here to sign up.
1:1 Coaching, my specialty is life balance (I’m a certified Time Hacker coach which means we can get you a minimum of 5 hours back a week and the maximum? Skies the limit! I work a 15 hour work week and am moving towards 12 - without exploiting people, that’s very important!) and taking action, ➡️ click here to learn more & check availability!